Saturday, October 9, 2010

K.O.'ed

...or 14 Pros & 1 Con On Being Eliminated From Project Food Blog.

Yep, no Round 4 for me. Knocked out in the 3rd. The guy was saying, "7....8...." and I just decided to pretend it was a grizzly bear attack. It was an amicable breakup, really. No hard feelings. Well, hardly any...

PROS
  1. This REALLY frees up my Saturdays. And my Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays....
  2. My cuticles will look a helluva lot better.
  3. I'll finally finish that post on "Cookin' Cheap" that I've been working on. Laban and Larry wouldn't see the light of day until Christmas, but now? Publish City honey!
  4. I never would have learned that Southern Tier Creme Brulee Stout pairs extremely well with disappointment.
  5. I won't have to worry about how that huge amount of dough would drastically change the lifestyle to which I have become accustomed.
  6. All that campaigning in October made me feel like a politician. Ew.
  7. My kitchen will look like a kitchen again instead of an effing photography studio.
  8. Ruhlman never won no stinkin' contests. William Kennedy either! Oh, well, except for that whole Pulitzer thing.
  9. Now I can go to the Garlic Festival tomorrow instead of pulling my hair out worrying that my tomato pictures look like they were taken with a Polaroid Instamatic.
  10. Something tells me if I had stayed in the competition sometime in the future Foodbuzz would have me espousing the wonderful flavor profile of Chili's Chicken Crispers.
  11. I never would have heard the phrase, "If anybody had had the sense that God gave geese you would've won." My new favorite quote said by my new favorite person in the whole freaking wide world, Leni Sorenson.
  12. My sister suggested a "F*@% You Foodbuzz!" dinner party. She's volunteered to bring the champagne.
  13. My friend Laura Beall Payne (an incredible personal chef btw), suggested a "F*@% Foodbuzz!" pie. Graham cracker crust, honey, banana pudding, peanut butter swirl. Mmmmm, that just might go well with that stout.
  14. No offense to the great bloggers who made it through, but something tells me good writing isn't a top criteria for these judges. Tablescapes? A definite Sandra-Lee-Cocktail-Christmas-Tree YES.
CON
  1. I really wanted to donate that money. I really really did.
We will resume regularly scheduled programming on Monday. Hell, I might even continue posting the Project Food Blog challenges just for grins. I've got most of them written anyways. I think my feelings at this moment are best summed up by the 1973 hit single, "If You Want Me to Stay" by Sly and the Family Stone. Yikes, I sound like Mary Katherine Gallagher, and the song is actually about a guy promising not to cheat - but still. The first lyric puts it perfectly:

If you want me to stay
I'll be around today
To be available for you to see
I'm about to go
And then you'll know
For me to stay here I've got to be me.

Yep, something tells me I just wasn't a good fit for a contest sponsored by Buick Lacrosse. Now Mini-Cooper? Maybe. Now, if you'll excuse me I'm going to go crank up the volume. Sly's an excellent pairing for disappointment too.

7 comments:

Kashia said...

That's how I felt about two weeks ago :) You did a great job and I'm glad I found your blog, you're hilarious and not bad in the kitchen ;)

Lindsey @ FRESH AIR + FRESH FOOD said...

Yes! Yes! Yes! Sandra Lee Tablescapes, expensive cameras, and a very basic ability to put three words together and add a period. I was axed too - and then took a nap! How relaxing!

Dolly said...

I loved your Project Food blog posts, Jenee. If you need a fellow blogger with whom to sip champagne, I'm here for ya. That cocktail christmas tree video--freakin' hilarious.

I think you should host your own project food blog competition right here in Charlottesville, and inspire high school students to participate...kinda like the Jamie Oliver restaurant 15, but in a food blog project sort of way...and still raise $$ for a worthy cause.

Why the heck not?

Libby said...

Thanks for the great comments guys. This was the challenge out of all of them that I worried about most. I'm a food writer, not a cook who makes stuff and photographs it, which I made perfectly clear in my first post. Guess they were looking more for the latter and not the former. Which is fine by me, just frees me up to do more food writing.

For the record, I wish only the best for the remaining contestants. I'm grateful I was eliminated, because the more I think about it, this just wasn't the competition for me. Still finding my voice and this contest helped with that too. It just sucks I couldn't win some money for the Food Bank and PB&J Fund.

@Dolly, nice try girl. But if planning a dinner party would put me in a strait jacket I can't imagine what would happen if I planned a weeks-long blogging competition! That said, if there are any event gurus out there willing to take this on, I'm glad to volunteer. Cheers!

Anna said...

Loved loved this post. OMG! Giiiiirl I'm so tired of run like a chicken without a head. I had so many breakdowns already, I'm truly breaking my husband balls. And even think about the video thing (if I make that far of course) gives me pimples and makes my eye twitch. lol. Loved the idea of the F@88** foodbuzz party. Specially the champagne part.

Libby said...

@Anna, you're doing GREAT!!! Your beautiful pictures make me so jealous....I KNOW you'll make it as far as the video, I just know it! Must admit, I'm feeling very relaxed about the whole thing now, LOL...I had such a great idea for the video too....and I'm STILL going to do it! Take that *karate chop* :D

Anna said...

lol...That's genius Looking forward to see that.